Staying Positive Around Negative People

Dear Dr. Simon: I am generally happy and content (I think mainly because I view much of my life positively and appreciate even the difficulties that I’ve experienced at times). However, sometimes my happiness becomes bittersweet because I feel affected by the unhappiness of my family members, friends, and acquaintances who often fail to see the good in life and become overwhelmed by their problems. How can I maintain the calm frame of mind and inner peace I experience through meditation when I am surrounded by people who express negativity and perceive their problems as obstacles instead of hurdles to be overcome? I think my question comes down to whether it is possible to not be influenced by others.

Thank you,
Naomi

Dear Naomi: As sentient beings we are naturally in perpetual exchange with the energy and information around us. For many people, their inner mood directly mirrors what is happening around them. A yogi, acting as a spiritual warrior, strives to achieve a state of equanimity and awareness so that regardless of the turbulence dominating the environment, his or her inner sense of peace is undisturbed.

Although it may seem that this spiritual state is one of detachment, the ability to stay in your own center while interacting with people who are losing theirs is actually the most compassionate way to live. If you get caught in another’s negativity, there are now two suffering people instead of one. If you can stay centered in your own expanded state of awareness, you have the best chance to help others expand their perspective. Then they can formulate a more creative response to life’s inevitable challenges. The best way to serve others is to leave them feeling lighter than they were before your interaction.

with love,
David

This entry was posted on Wednesday, August 26th, 2009 at 4:15 pm and is filed under Ask Dr. Simon. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.